Still

Time deceives me now.
Here lay I, in torturous await,
Wishing, waiting, for it to fly by.
Maybe time is confused,
With my constant cry for it to speed, or slow.
Or, simply put.

Time does not know.
& time can't tell what truth I hide inside.

The firefly

Hidden beneath, inside, so deep,
A thousand fireflies flutter.
To the flattering thoughts of fondness,
Relentlessly, I try to seal.
These secrets, feelings and truth
Only to find myself bound,
To a path of beautiful insanity.

That leaves me to smile a lot to myself, lately.

Mindless thoughts

Honesty,

is the hidden truth, unveiled by insight.
Of realization, finding sincerity.
Honesty can hurt.
Or heal.

Ignorance,

is an excuse.
To hide the lurking guilt.
The denial of the truth.
Ignorance fools the self, into accepting the superficial;
the false.

Success,

is temporary.
The milestone of greed,
A motivation for more.
Overwhelms.

Failure,

is weakness,
Or strength in disguise.
Fight or flight.
Failure recovers humility.

Ambiguity. Not really...

There is sweetness emerging from this beginning.

Dare I put my feelings into words?

Or is my egotistical self restraining me.

Maybe I am afraid of jinxing it.
It might turn upside down....if i say anything!

I'm acting silly, aren't I?
Well, an email made me feel this way.

High School Withdrawal Symptoms

Time flies & I believe it.
I am guilty of wishing it to fly faster. That would be my selfishness speaking, refusing to come to terms with time. Desperately wanting to skip the many goodbyes I've had (and will have to) say.

Reality has sort of been a blur.
There is this transitional phase I have undergone; metaphorically, this one step that separates my past and enters me into another world of untarnished colour.
Well, this world seems too new at the moment.

Practically empty.
Empty of thoughts. Empty of memories.

Do I miss the past? At the moment, I think I do. Just yesterday I passed by the street I first moved into, first arriving to this country. By the landmarks that marked memories. Then passed this structure symbolic of this transition, a place I used to call my 'second-home' from having spent more time there than anywhere else. I'd thought to myself then, that I can no longer call the place 'my school'. I've used that possessive noun far too loosely many times that I overlooked the truth. It's really funny how from a silly statement like that evoked a twisted frenzy of time, feelings and memories. Making me feel trapped.

Happiness depends upon ourselves -Aristotle

The sweetest of all days,
The happiest of all memories
I will hold on to the promises,
I will never forget the feelings
Never in my entire life have I felt two emotions at opposite ends of the spectrum at once.
And never will I forget this feeling of a dream accomplished.

...I am valedictorian for the Class of 'o9!

2 Days of classes left.

They distributed the yearbooks today.
Signing farewells and goodbyes just made everything seem so much more surreal.
Reading them...just makes it ten times more REAL.